Empiracal Proof-Wal-Mart is the AntiChrist

And if this picture wasn't enough....












You can read this from a bike forum of which I am a member.

"So I generally choose not to patronize walmart for several moral reasons...but today I was in desperate need of some CD-Rs so I could mail a file to my university and the only place anywhere near me that sells them is Wally world. So I grudgingly got on my bike and made the 4 mile ride on some pretty dangerous roads only to find that they have no form of bike rack whatsoever. That's typical for this area so I've become used to just taking my bike into stores...in fact I usually use the basket on the back as a shopping cart.

So I walk into the walmart and the most evil grandmother I've ever met grabs my arm with her claws and says I can't bring it into the store. I explained to here there was nowhere outside to lock it up and that I had brought it into that particular store with no problem. She insisted that I had to leave it in the foyer and I calmly said that I wasn't going to leave a 600 dollar bike just sitting in the foyer and that I'd like to speak to her manager.

So the manager comes out and says I can't bring the bike into the store, so I explain to her that there are safe places for people who drive to lock their cars but there is no safe place for me to lock my mode of transportation. She says that I should have driven there I told her that I didn't own a car and that my bike was my only form of transportation and I couldn't risk having it stolen. She said I couldn't bring it in because they sell bikes in the store. So I said but those bikes don't look anything like this and this is clearly not a brand new bike, so why is that a problem. She insisted that for the safety of the other customers I couldn't bring it inside, so I asked her why she thought a bike controlled by an adult was more dangerous than a shopping cart being pushed around by someone's bratty kids. So she switched back to the excuse that they sell bikes in the store so I couldn't bring another bicycle in. I was starting to get really frustrated since I had ridden all the way there seemingly for no reason, so I asked her if they also sold shirts in the store. She said yes so I took off my jersey and said well then I'd better not bring this in either. She got kind of flustered and said that it was a different situation but couldn't explain why. So I said that if they also sold shorts in the store that I'd better not wear those in either and I took off my shorts. Same goes for the shoes and sunglasses. Now I'm standing there in my spandex and a sports bra and I ask here if I can leave my things behind the customer service counter where they will be safe until I finish making my purchases and she said that I couldn't come into the store without shoes on, to which i responded "but I certainly can't wear shoes into the store because you sell those here and someone might think I've stolen them." She threatened to call security if I didn't leave so I told her that I would never be coming back to that store again and that I was glad I hadn't driven there since the gas to go four miles was probably more expensive than what her underpaid employees make in an hour.

Her expression when the shirt came off was absolutely priceless...I was pretty tempted to take off the spandex too but I wasn't sure what constitutes indecent exposure in Virginia so I figured I'd err on the side of caution. Still I had a decent sized crowd gathered before the end of the discussion. Anybody else have issues with Satan's superstore?"

Crap....

I just realized that I have to ride that route BACK!

*sigh*

Today's ride-little bit longer distance

Over the weekend I changed out tires from Rock Combos (26x1.95) to a set of Conti Contacts26x1.75). I also changed out grips from the stock foamies to a set of Ergon E1's and I had a new pair of Pearl Izumi gloves to break in.

5 minutes. That's what I cut off this morning...and with an extra 3/4 mile added as well.

74 Degrees
Light headwind
mostly sunny, but still dawnish at 7 am.
Distance 5.75 miles.

I gained 5 minutes on my time, even havingt to stop for some crossings a little longer than normal. I was running late as it is, left my house at about 645 to go to my staging point, about 5 miles from work. I dropped the bike, strapped on various things (did you know that if you check the pockets of your Timbuk2 bag you find all kinds of stuff you never knew was there after a year-like the cross strap?), and threw on some tunes. This morning it was a combination of Beastie Boys, some 80's Hair bands, and Music from the Lonely Planet, a series that was on the Discovery Channel and had great music if you are into World/Fusion.

Took off from Hyvee, down Union, over to 34th and down, hit the Tierra. Got to experience my first intersection confusion as I reminded myself to signal so the the guy on the really nice bike next to me knew if I was turning off of 34th or going straight *Sorry*. The Tierra part of the trail is named in part for a park that it goes through, sort of an Apt. Complex/Really large adjacent park next to it. It's got these little canals that go along the one side, with some trees overhanging here and there. Really pretty. Dodged a rabbit and what I think might have been an Oriel.

Got onto RI and crossed 27th on a bridge that someone so thoughtfully paid for, and onto the main trail. Here is where the fun starts-there was a guy at the bridge that crossed me before I turned, so I was behind him for a little while. The RI trail ends up at a YMCA, maybe a mile and a half from the bridge where we turned. In there, after I hit a stride (and a particular favorite BB track) I picked up the pace and ended up calling 'left' on the guy that had been ahead of me. Glanced down as I went (Trek frame, knobby tires) and passed him somewhere between 27th and Old Cheney with a mile and a half to go to the Y. As I glanced and went by, I also noticed that he was a young guy, and had an LFD and Rescue shirt on-those ones they only issue to the Municipal Fire and Rescue.

WoOt! Go FatRacer go go Fat Racer!

So, with some good tunes, decent tires, and a little unintended personal comptition (that this guy was not going to pass me back up until at least the end of RI) anything is possible. I also discovered that a 1/2 inch is a big deal. The new grips helped immensely, but I still started feeling the tingles just after Old Cheney (about mile 4ish). I moved my butt back a 1/2" in the saddle, and felt that 'flood of feeling' into my fingers. My leg position seems to be fine, but I think im putting a bit much weight on my hands-minor adjustment to my position and Wow. Went probably 3/4 mile more today than last week by trusting the rest of the trail in instead of turning off of it go to along the street.

Yip Yip, Yahooy!

Space Chimps.....watch out, its the Space Chimps.......

Uggghhh.....

It has been three weeks since America was introduced to the animated hit WALL-E and already another animated flick, Space Chimps, has hit theaters.

‘Space Chimps’ begins at the circus, where a chimp named Ham III (voice of Andy Samberg) is doing his typical circus act; being blasted into the sky from a cannon. Ham III is happy with his circus life, but due to his family history, things start to change. Ham’s grandfather was the first chimpanzee to go into space, so when NASA begins looking for chimps to take part in a wild space mission, Ham seems to be the chimp for the job.

After being forced into space training, Ham is teamed up with Lieutenant Luna (voice of Cheryl Hines) and Commander Titan (voice of Patrick Warburton), and before he knows it he is headed for an intergalactic wormhole in search of a $5 billion NASA probe that was lost.

Once the team reaches the worm hole they are sent to the planet Malgor, which is filled with weird creatures that are currently being harassed by the evil warlord Zartog (Jeff Daniels) who has plans to take over the planet. The chimps arrive just in time to help save the creatures from the evil dictator.

Now the movie may sound innocent, cute and nice, but sitting through this short film was the worst experience I have had at the movies in a long time. ‘Space Chimps’ doesn’t only lack a good storyline, but the animation looks like something a college student would have done for a project, which is sad considering one of the producers of the film is the mastermind behind the Shrek movies.

The aliens used in the film were the weirdest looking characters I have ever seen in a movie, and the main alien in the film, Kilowatt (voice of Kristen Chenoweth), got to be downright annoying within the first few minutes of seeing her.

Overall I was just unimpressed with this movie. I was anxious to see it, hoping it might actually be a fun children’s movie, but the way it jumps around so much might make it hard for a younger kid to follow along and pay attention.

Yet another poor choice for this movie was the release date because of the competition. ‘The Dark Knight’ and ‘Mamma Mia!’ will be the big releases for the week, and ‘Space Chimps’ is sure to disappoint at the box office.

On the positive note however, ‘The Dark Knight’ and ‘Mamma Mia!’ are for older audiences and are not really for the younger children in any way, shape or form. So, if you have to pick a movie appropriate for all ages, Space Chimps is the way to go this weekend. It is a short film, only running at 1 hour and 15 minutes, and it’s rated G.

Recommended:
No

Movie Mood: None of the Above
Viewing Method: Sneak Preview at My Local Theater
Film Completeness: Looked complete to me.
Worst Part of this Film: Everything

Response to article on biking today in LJS

I wrote this in response to a LJS article about a full time bike commuter and his wife that was in the paper today.


"Part time commuting is easy, too. I put some semi-slick tires on my old MTB (they ride better) and a different set of grips, and I drive part way then ride partway to work now as i'm building up to the whole trip. Most of my trip is on Lincoln City trails which are smooth, paved, and have some great regulars on them. I ride about 5 miles one way right now and I get to work in 35 minutes at a leisurely pace. I towel off at work, put on some more antiperspirant, and change clothes. I eat less crap food since I can't jump in my car for lunch. I get my exercise in for the day and some time to myself as well. You don't need a 1000 dollar bike or even a 500 dollar bike (craigslist is your friend), you don't need funny shorts or biker beanie caps. I'd recommend gloves and sunglasses and that's about it. Get a rack, and maybe a messenger bag or something and you are good to go. I weigh 280 and can do it, pretty quickly, so anyone can. Most of the rest of the world uses bicycles as a vehicle-they aren't toys. We Americans seem to be one of the few cultures that invents devices to simulate work, so we don't feel guilty about the lack of 'work' we do."

I hate plateaus...